UtahCoParents

 Co-Parenting Tips

 A Sample Parenting Plan

In making this agreement, we, in the best interest of our child/children acknowledge the following:

Ground Rules

1)    We have chosen to resolve our parenting issues through means other than the courtroom; preferring to use discussion, mediation, parent coordinators, or other collaborative means of settling our disagreements. In the event a future dispute arises between us we cannot resolve ourselves, we agree to enter into mediation before we seek a resolution in court.

2)    We are both dedicated parents who, though divorced, desire to create a co-parenting relationship for the benefit of our children.

3)    We recognize we have made mistakes in the past and desire to start over as better and more committed parents.

4)    We agree to focus on the needs and interests of our children ahead of our own. We desire to give our children the opportunity to have a meaningful relationship with both of us.

5)    Any specific time-sharing schedule must focus on meeting our children’s emotional needs as much as possible. Because these needs will change over time, we agree to approach the establishment and revisions of the time-sharing schedule in a flexible manner. We agree that spending quality time with the children is important, and we agree to cooperate with each other and adjust our time sharing arrangement to ensure this is possible.

6)    We agree to establish and maintain good communication with each other and to establish a supportive working relationship as parents, which will be built on trust and cooperation. We believe that open and direct communication is essential to an effective parenting relationship, and will ensure to take steps to have frequent communication in a civil manner.

7)    We agree to trade favors frequently. This will encourage cooperation and flexibility in our parenting relationships and prevent resentments from accumulating between us.

8)    We agree to support each other in our respective parenting roles, while recognizing that we may have different parenting styles. We agree to support each other as parents by giving compliments and showing appreciation to each other and to give our children permission to love both parents.

9)    We recognize that it is important for our children’s emotional well-being that we hold the other parent in high esteem as a parent in our conversations with our children throughout their lives.

10) We recognize that conflict between us causes emotional trauma and pain to our children. We agree to be civil in all of our future dealings and agree to leave the past in the past. We agree to start today working together as co-parents and seeing the other parent as a positive resource.

Parenting Meeting

We agree to meet the first  ________________  of each month/week or have a phone conversation to discuss our time sharing arrangement  for the month/week and to share information regarding our children’s needs and issues.  We agree to reschedule this meeting within a reasonable time if that day is inconvenient for one of us.

Vacations

We agree to discuss with each other how we want to spend our respective vacation time with the children. We will work out an arrangement that is mutually acceptable to both of us. We do agree, however, to give advance notice to the other parent of a planned vacation. If possible, we agree to give two weeks notice.

Babysitter Rule

We agree to call the other parent first, whenever possible, for our babysitting needs, recognizing the other parent has a right to decline.

Revision of Time-Sharing Schedule

In order to better meet the emotional needs our children, we agree to revise the the time sharing schedule, if necessary, by consulting with each other and cooperatively establishing a new time sharing schedule. We also agree to consider revising our schedule if a significant change occurs in either of our lives. We agree to first meet with each other to modify the time sharing arrangement and if we are unable to agree on a new schedule we agree to hire a mediator to assist us before we seek as resolution in court.

Sharing Information: 

We both agree that is important that for our children to see us working together in a positive and constructive way. Therefore:

1)    We agree to use our best efforts to communicate and share information with each other on a frequent basis regarding our children’s development, school work, medical and dental treatment, and therapy.

2)    We agree to notify the other parent of all school programs, church events, extracurricular activities, and sporting events that involve our children.

3)    We agree to notify the other parent of significant illnesses the children may have when they are at our homes.

4)    We agree to discuss any problems either one of us is experiencing in regard to disciplining our children.

5)    We agree to immediately advise the other parent of any changes in our address, telephone number(s), or other information pertinent to communication.

6)    We agree to advise the other parent of all logistical details regarding vacation time with our children, including times, places and phone numbers where the children may be reached.

Consistency in Discipline and Parenting

1)    We agree that consistency is one of the key elements of raising children. Therefore, we would like to see the same curfews and bedtimes implemented at each of our homes whenever possible.

2)    We recognize that our discipline and parenting of our children will be more effective if we work as a united front.” Therefore, we agree to discuss discipline and philosophies with each other and come to a consensus as to what works best with our children.

Major Decisions

1)    We agree that all major decisions concerning our children, including their    health, education, daycare, medical and dental treatment, and therapy will be discusses. We agree to focus on developing possible solutions and to choose the most sensible solution that considers the needs and interests of everyone involved.

2)    We agree to meet and discuss major decisions together, focusing on facts, and to involve any professionals who may be of assistance to our children.

3)    We agree that the parent who has the child at the time he/she suffers an emergency medical condition has the authority to make any decision regarding emergency medical care. We agree to notify the other parent about the event as soon as possible.

4)    We understand that whatever parent has physical custody of our children may make day-to-day decisions regarding their care.

Long-Distance Parenting

1)    In the event either of us decides to move out of state or to a location in the state that makes our time sharing arrangement impractical, we agree to revise our arrangement by discussion and to reach a new time sharing agreement prior to the parent’s actual move.

2)    The issues we agree to address include, but are not limited to: Time sharing, transportation details and cost allocation, procedures to ensure that decision making can be shared when required, and procedures for sharing information about our children. 

3)    If we cannot reach a long-distance parenting agreement on our own, we agree to consult with a mediator before we seek a resolution in court.